Apocalypse

"Life, death and rebirth are inevitable."

~Riq Veda

*

We stood staring out into the abyss, nothing behind us but devastation, a barren wasteland, nothing in front of us but darkness. The pungent smell of sulfur from the explosions filled the air. I held my two-year old daughter in my arms. She grabbed me as tight as her little arms would let her and buried her face into my shoulder. The screams frightened her and she just wanted to go home.

“Don’t worry baby, everything’s gonna be alright,” I whispered and kissed her on her neck, shielding her from the danger that lay beyond.

I turned to face my ten-year old son who had been standing by my side. His body shook with fear, but he stared intently at my face his hazel eyes locked in mine, fighting back the tears.

“You know whatchu gotta do?” I asked him in the serious tone that meant I expected him to already know what he had to do, and that I shouldn’t even have to ask.

He nodded his head slowly and bit his lower lip, never taking his eyes off mine.

“Excuse me?” I growled.

“Yes,” he stuttered, “Yes, sir!”

I handed him his sister. She struggled as I pried her tiny hands free from my body. I felt empty when she finally let go and grabbed a hold of her brother. I could no longer feel her heart beating next to mine and it killed me inside to think that I may never again, but I knew what needed to be done.

I crouched down to one knee, never taking my eyes off of my son’s. I laid my right hand on his trembling shoulder.

“You take care a yer sister now, ya heard? Don’t you dare let nothin happen ta her!”

“Yes sir!”

I squeezed his shoulder and nodded my head in approval.

“I’m proud a you,” I told him, partly because he needed to hear it, and partly because I didn’t know if I’d be back.

I turned toward the abyss, the sound of my daughter begging me not to leave barely audible above the echoing screams from within the darkness. I took one last deep breath and stepped in.

At once everything behind me vanished. I turned around and around, but they were gone. There was no turning back. I stood there, unable to move. The screams grew louder. They were coming for me.

Suddenly the air went cold. My body froze. I could no longer breathe. And, they were upon me. My blood boiled. I wanted to fight like I had so many times before, but I couldn’t. There was no fight left in me.

I opened my arms, lifted my head and smiled. The demons were all there: Pride, Wrath, Greed, Sloth, Envy, Lust, and Gluttony, Pride being the worst of them. They ripped at my flesh and tore at my soul, but I did not fight. I knew it was pointless.

I bowed my head and did the only thing I could do; I accepted them. I let them have what they wanted, and it comforted me. I let them into my soul and they hugged me like old friends with their icy grips. I held on for as long as I could, having no concept of time because it did not exist in this place, until I began to gasp for air, but none would come.

Father help me!, I pleaded, I can’t take anymore!

I no sooner thought the words then a light shone in the distance. It was the Seraphim. They had come, just as I had been promised. The closer they came, the brighter their light became until it was blinding. I closed my eyes just in time to feel them reach me.

I opened my eyes and just as suddenly as it had come, the light was gone and the demons began their attack again. This time they were louder and more ferocious than they had ever been, their screams and hisses deafening to my ears which had started to bleed. There were more than before. The seven multiplied having joined forces with the thousands of resentments I held from my past, ghosts that I had all but forgotten.

I shuddered and began to cry at the thought of what must be done. I took one last deep breath in and closed my eyes again. Then I let it out and as I did I let go. I did not come to fight. They came at me as before and I accepted them for what they were. They were MY demons. I had created them.

They began their descent into my soul intent on taking what they had come for, and again the light shone. This time it came from within me. The closer the demons came, the brighter it got. Their violent hisses and screams turned into painful wails of agony and they began to flee in terror from the light which grew until my body could no longer contain it.

Again I opened my eyes. The light surrounded me in a shield of pure, bright white. The demons circled, but they did not dare come close. They were ashamed and frightened, and couldn’t even stand to look in my direction. I laughed hysterically because after all this time and after all the power I had given them they were nothing more than cowards.

With every breath I took the light grew bigger. The sphere that shielded me expanded until I could no longer see anything but the light. I closed my eyes one last time and everything went blank. I felt like I was falling, suspended in time and space like Alice when she fell down the rabbit hole.

Finally it stopped. A calm settled over me. I opened my eyes and I was sitting on the brown suede recliner in my living room. I could smell coffee brewing. I looked over in amazement at my children who were off to my left, pillow fighting on the tan leather sofa.

My son stopped when he saw me looking his way.

“What’s wrong dad?” he said with a quizzical look on his face. I smiled my eyes meeting his like before, this time sparkling with life.

“Hell’s not that bad,” I replied.

“Huh?” he said, even more confused than before.

I just shook my head and laughed. He didn’t know, and I didn’t expect him to.